May 1, 2008

Relationships: Your Infusion or Poison

Relationships: Your Infusion or Poison

Psalm 119:63 “Anyone who fears You is my friend - anyone who obeys your commandments.”

Is your life a product of "well everyone else is doing it, why can’t I?" Any parent of a teen has heard this justification of reasoning. To what degree have we unknowingly become its victim? Peer pressure is real and surrounds each and every one of our lives in more ways than we care to admit.

Ted and Susie are in love. Their best friends Jack and Mary are in love, engaged, and planning their wedding. It has influenced Ted and Susie to think harder about getting married. No one is putting pressure on them, yet just the events leading up to Jack and Mary’s wedding is making them think more about it.

Bill and Sandy spend a great deal of time with their best friends Perry and Angela. Perry and Angela's new little baby girl Kristine now goes everywhere with the foursome. In some ways, Bill and Sandy fill like an aunt and uncle. Just being around this new beautiful little girl has begun to influence their thoughts toward having a baby.

We all know of peer pressures by association. It affects how we think and what we do. Many of us have seen children who were once focused and on a good path, become distracted and headed for trouble simply by a new friend or friends they've begun to associate with. As parents, there were times when it was appropriate for Renee and I to discourage or stop the development of a relationship in one of our children’s lives if their new friend clearly displayed an ongoing pattern of poor behavior and or attitude. We encouraged godly influences but discouraged the development of negative close relationships.

When what others do begins to lead us outside of God's ways or water down our standard for godliness and integrity, it's time to take a look at the relationship and decide if that is a relationship ordained by God. 2 Corinthians 6:14-18 (NLT) speaks with great authority to us, "Don't team up with those who are unbelievers. How can goodness be a partner with wickedness? How can light live with darkness? What harmony can there be between Christ and the Devil? How can a believer be a partner with an unbeliever?… For we are the temple of the living God. As God said: "I will live in them and walk among them. I will be their God, and they will be my people. Therefore, come out from them and separate yourselves from them, says the Lord. Don't touch their filthy things, and I will welcome you. And I will be your Father, and you will be my sons and daughters, says the Lord Almighty."

As an adult, you may believe you can manage the ungodly behavior of someone you have befriended. If relationships begin to negatively affect your thinking, perspectives, or your behavior and you don’t deal with it, you are absolutely wrong and in denial. You have put your confidence - false confidence - in thinking that you are stronger than the forces of evil that God warns us be flee or stay away from.

God paints us a picture in Haggai 2:12-14 (Amplified Bible.) "If one carries in the skirt of his garment, flesh that is holy… and with his skirt or the flaps of his garment he touches bread, or pottage, or wine, or oil, or any kind of food, does what he touches become holy…? And the priests answered, No! [Holiness is not infectious.] Then said Haggai, if one who is [ceremonially] unclean because he has come in contact with a dead body should touch any of these articles of food, shall it be [ceremonially] unclean? And the priests answered, it shall be unclean. [Unholiness is infectious.]

If we are living for God and work to influence others toward His love, that is our directive. At the same time we need to understand that our right living is not infectious – it’s not just going to automatically cause someone else to live for God just by our association. If we hang around and / or take in ungodly influences, it will automatically dilute and negatively affect us and our influence. Unholiness is infectious!

It isn't just people that we associate with that can drag us down and away from God. It's what ever we let in our sense gates - primarily our hearing and seeing. The filth the media surrounds us with - the large majority being immorally sexual - is now the humor and focal point of most things produced by Hollywood. Without developing a standard against it, you will become the victim of it. It will drag you down and away from God.

Until you yield to God's exhortation and step away from relationships that are unequally yoked, you won't be able to see your deception and how it's influenced you.

I've seen far too many Christian men and women think they can convert the unbelieving person they have allowed themselves to fall in love with only to later be disappointed and heartbroken. That will always be the result of disregarding God's instructions.

King David was one who from a boy realized the power of association and guarded his heart carefully. He esteemed God's heart, His standard, His laws, and all His ways, as more critical to his life than any other thing. David said in Psalm 119:72 (NLT) "Your law is more valuable to me than millions in gold and silver!" He went on to say how the standard of God's Word determined who he'd develop relationships with. We see this in Psalm 119:59-61 (NLT) "I pondered the direction of my life, and I turned to follow your statutes. I will hurry, without lingering, to obey your commands. Evil people try to drag me into sin, but I am firmly anchored to your law... v.63 "Anyone who fears you is my friend-- anyone who obeys your commandments…"

When it comes to ungodly influences, whether its people or what we take in, there is pressure that comes from those associations. Jesus said we don't hide from the world. We live in it. We work to influence it. But, when it comes to the relationships that we become close friends in, follow David’s example – today’s verse – "Anyone who fears you is my friend - anyone who obeys your commandments…"

Pastor Tim Burt
Fresh Manna
http://readfreshmanna.blogspot.com

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